06 September, 2007

Different Perspective

I enjoy meeting and talking to new people.  If the connection is right and the conversation  lacks confinement, I can sit back, relax, and talk for hours.  Relaxing into a conversation, allowing myself to truly listen to what is being said, I find myself privy to interesting ideas, notions, and perspectives I have never considered. 
This is one such example:
(I am paraphrasing what a new guy friend said) 
Size doesn't matter to men.  It isn't until women become involved that size begins to matter.  It is about wanting to please a woman and be seen as good.
Intriguing.  (Such conversations are one of the many reasons I love talking to and having men in my life)
If women are removed from the equation, men simply wouldn't be concerned over their size - 5" or 9" - it would all be the same and irrelevant.
Would it - seriously?
Perhaps I have simply bought into the urban legend that men are consumed with size - the bigger the better - as if it is a sign of masculinity, virility, and fertility.  The essence of man is entombed in 4-9 inches of skin and blood.  
And now I learn that I may be mistaken.  It is women; a nuance of performance anxiety; and the desire of a man to engage and please a woman that draws attention to size.  
This idea asks that I open my mind just a bit more to consider a very different perspective - and I do.  I can see the logic behind the concept.  
I then find myself wondering - are men truly that selfless that their desire to give the best possible to the woman in question asks that they reflect and take stock of the equipment they have on hand?
Or is it their desire to be the top cock on the block that provokes them to do and give the best possible to their mate?
*sigh* and men say that they are simple...  


Unknown said...

Your new friend is right, EO.

It's that simple.

TAG said...

I respectfully disagree. 100% disagreement.

Men by their very nature are competitive. You've seen this behavior manifest in many different ways. Whether the competition is strongest, or fastest or even nicest yard.

I think it goes back to evolution. Men are always trying to be "better" than the next guy.

When primitive men (and women) walked the earth, the men had to compete by means we can only speculate about today. But competition there was. The women chose the mates they felt best won the competition. (This happens today whether we are conscious of it or not.)

We've all heard it said that length of the penis and satisfaction level of the ladies who enjoy that length do not have a direct correlation. But satisfaction level is something one can't easily measure OR tell before the enjoyment. So it comes back to being judged based on something one can see before and is easily measured. LENGTH.

That is just my 2 cents (and ample length).


Scotty said...

are men truly that selfless that their desire to give the best possible to the woman in question asks that they reflect and take stock of the equipment they have on hand?

Some are. But then again those that are are only thinking about the physical aspects of it. I mean, short of the 'Extender' you wrote of before, how can they change? They can't.

Maybe its their idea that nothing is wrong with their technique, because it feels good to them. Which is of course wrong since there are very few things that do not feel good to a man. Right?

I would cough it up to men thinking of only the physical attributes of the act, and not thinking of the other 99% that goes into it.

Kennethwongsf said...

I think it's best for us to refrain from making sweeping generalizations. Men come in as many varieties as the shapes and sizes of their instruments. Some link (for better or worse) their masculinity to the dimensions of their reproductive organs; others simply aren't that concerned. Mechanically, the fit (both emotional and physical) is probably far more important than the length and diameter of the rod taken alone.

Mike said...

Men may joke with other about size. However it truly boils down to wanting to please and be seen as a good lover.

The Exception said...

Wombat - Sure, yeah, men are simple. You guys just keep telling yourselves that!

TAG - The question is, how do men think when women are removed from the situation?

Scotty - There have to be things that do not feel good to men. Men who are open to exploring and creating variations to the SOP are... quite attractive.

Mike - So you agree with my friend?

Kenneth - Well stated. Generalizing is not always the wisest move, but it can create an opportunity for discussion and the sharing of perspectives.

TAG said...

Even without the ladies in the equation, guys compete. Remember the old tv show Tool Time? That was a classic example of men competing via tools and tool collections. Part of what made it funny was the very real truth they pointed out. Men compete.

I'm not saying this applies to 100% of men 100% of the time. But I am saying it applies to 100% of the men at least part of the time.

Personally, I do not view pleasing a lover as any sort of competition. But there is competition to get the opportunity to please.

In my profession I've been saying for years that if you are good enough, what others are doing doesn't matter. I think much of that same philosophy applies here as well. If you are good enough, it matters not about the other guys.


Mike said...

Yes I do. No one wants to be different, but once you get past the teenage years who really cares. If you do there is probably a high level of insecurity.

cathouse teri said...

Um.. I'm confused now. The only men I know who are consumed with the concept of size are fucking idiots. And I don't wanna be with them anyway. It's just soooooooooooo unsexy!

Airam said...

I hear it's not the size but how it's used.

Could the same be said with women though? Does vanity exist because men want really beautiful women?

The Exception said...

Teri - Definitely not sexy, but some do worry about it. I suppose it is similar to women worrying about their ability to attract men.

Mike - There is always that type A personality that strives to be at the top of their game, regardless of what it takes.

TAG - Perhaps it is also if you believe in your ability - and no one is complaining - then the others don't matter.

Airam - Applying a similar notion to women was where I was going next. It seems a bit different in that, for men it might be less about appearance and more about the ability to perform? For women, performance is not an issue as much as the concern of being as attractive as possible - hopefully the most attractive in the room?

It all boils down to being confident with what with what we have.