14 June, 2010

Out of Balance

This weekend I watch the movie Marmaduke.

It isn’t going to win any awards nor did it receive great reviews, but I have to admit that I laughed a lot and cried a little as I watched.  Then again, I am a sucker for animals and their antics!

One of the more poignant themes for me was the dad, Phil, dealing with his kids and family and dog and job – that lack of balance came through loud and clear as the movie progressed until… he stopped thanks to Marmaduke. 

Balance is difficult to obtain.  At times in our lives we become consumed with work or with issues or challenges.  We allow something to over shadow everything else for a period of time – throwing everything out of balance.  The challenge is not allowing that “out of balance” to become the norm – and yet, my guess is that some people do just that.  Often when we allow something to happen for a certain length of time, that becomes the norm; that becomes the way we live our lives.  To find the balance again – or to find it for the first time – we have to stop, step back, and remember our priorities.  We have to find a means of seeing the way our lives are spinning.  It isn’t always easy to find that distance and see what is happening – perhaps it is more difficult to stop and take action, allowing balance to return. 

Finding balance means saying no.  It means setting boundaries as to the place work and family and friends and such have in our lives.  It could mean putting way the Blackberry or turning off the computer.  It could means standing up to your boss (as in the movie) and saying “no” risking… your job?  It could even mean standing up to your spouse or significant other and saying” no.”

As I watched the movie, I could sense the reflection of American society playing on screen.  The dad wanted to have more – to be a larger success professionally.  He was willing to move his family, work all hours, and do what it took to be all he could be in his profession.  I know so many who live their lives like this.  

The idea of proving themselves or dong everything asked of them prevails.  The idea of saying “no” for themselves, for their families, for whatever personal reason seems foreign as it could mean a loss of job.  And yet, what do we loose when we don’t say “no?”  When we elect to make an out of balance life our “norm?”



Wilma Ham said...

Dear TE, I agree that 'no' is a very magical word in life.
And yet, what do we loose when we don’t say “no?”
I have lost a lot by not saying 'no' sooner in my previous marriage. I became a martyr and in the end I lost anyway. There are consequences of saying 'no', when I stopped being a martyr the family did not like it and made me wrong. The biggest thing I had to do was to convince myself that I had a right of saying 'no'. From that position of confidence I could hold my ground and deal with the consequences. xox Wilma

chaniagirl said...

It is easier to say no, I think, when we understand what we are saying yes to. But this side of the coin isn't always presented in the magazine articles and feature posts presented to us.

I've learned that for every no there is a yes, and vice versa.

dadshouse said...

Balance is a wonderful thing! I'll check this movie out on DVD sometime. Thanks for the review.

Sara said...

Wow. This was a very good post for me to read. Since my surgeries, I've been trying to get back into my regular work routine, but it's been a challenge.

I think it is, in part, due to the balance between my body's recovery and my ego. I do need more rest and patience about letting myself take that time. I feel in my gut, this will help restore my own balance.

Thanks for this very helpful post:~)