How things have changed since college. Now, when I get together with friends, old and new, the topic of conversation is usually kids, friends, marriage, divorce, work... rarely do we get together and philosophize as we once did.
I miss those philosophical conversations. I miss hanging out with people and chatting about thoughts, ideas, concepts, current events, etc. Everyone presenting their perspective with ease and comfort knowing that no one will be offended or judged.
Those were the days...I truly thought they'd never end...
For a few years the philosophical conversations resumed. how delighted I was to sit in the lobby at ballet with a few moms who enjoyed discussions as much as I did. Nothing was beyond our interest - the fueling process for nuclear reactors, effectiveness of the flu vaccine against H5N1, the most child friendly countries to visit with our children, etc. We chatted about everything. And then ballet went to an hour class leaving us time to run errors.
I used to enjoy such discussions with coworkers as well... the endless debate as to why economics does not rule the world - and why politics does....
Sigh, yes, those were the days.
Then I discovered the world of blogs. People all over the world posting their adventures, misadventures, life lessons, thoughts, perspectives, analysis of current events.... this was something I found I could truly enjoy. And I have and do enjoy it except...
I also find it incredibly frustrating.
Every once in a while, more often than not of late, I find a post that simply touches the surface of a topic. The comments continue the discussion in various ways. Then the author posts on another topic and the discussion... well, just goes away.
I find myself wanting more. I want to truly talk about the issue, analyze the different perspectives, see if we can reach a common understanding of the issue at large. I want to know exactly what the author was thinking and how that might apply to other sides of the same issue.
I want to sit down, share a cup of coffee or a nice meal and a few hours and just... philosophize.
18 comments:
Spot on, EO.
It's like we need a sub-blog for those topics that take on a life of their own. Or every commenter should vote on whether the original poster should continue in the same vein.
I vote you continue writing about this topic.
I could literally spend all day reading blogs and there are many bloggers I would love to get to spend time with.
It's hard to recall the last social event where almost every one of my stories didn't start with, 'did I tell you what the twins did...'
"Those were the days...I truly thought they'd never end..." Ooo really dating yourself with these lyrics.
When the topic hits home I usually email the person to continue the discussion. Then it's fully discussed plus you get to know the other person more.
There are bloggers I'd be delighted to have a all-night-long conversation with. As good and efficient as the blog format is, it still is no substitute for a face-to-face meeting.
Agreed, Mizzy. (That's Ms E for short... or long.)
I hate stopping a subject just when it gets rolling. Kinda like stopping sex just when the foreplay is gettin' good.
Super frustrating!
I see what you mean. I guess, relatively, I don't post controversial subject matter. But it would be nice to carry on the "conversation" sometimes.
But I think that's the nature of personal blogs- we spout, we get feedback, we move on.
Good thing for "real life" friends. :)
Okay: Early use of tapestry in romanesque basilicas.
Let's run with it!
Hello - just stumbled across your blog. Interesting bit of read, not to mention today's post. I would agree with about 90% and the other 10% well... Perhaps I might visit your blog later down the road of life
You're right about comments taking on a life of their own. I'm often struck with what strikes people about a post, usually a small point that was not at all involved with what I was trying to say.
That said, the twists of the comments are interesting; and, to your point, isn't it the duty of the commenter and the blogger to follow up on the main point if both think the conversation is worth continuing?
reading that made me want to cry. you are so right.
i crave for conversation where i can talk freely with people about the differences between us rather than the things we have in common. (the latter seems to be the case particularly with the school parents circles we mix in). oh, for a conversation that i can challenge, agree, disagree, laugh from the belly, cry with sympathy, not judge or be judged...
i am thinking about joining a book club....anything to get some mental stimulation.
i also love blogging to get some perspective, but for me it is escapism (anonymity) and i need
something tangible...christ i do.
Wombat - It was actually one of your posts that inspired this. The comments went in a direction that was curious and intriguing.
Is there more to write on this subject?
MC - I know exactly what you mean!
Mike - I have thought about that, but have done it only a few times - more because I can't comment as often as I would like.
Kenneth - Nothing replaces that face to face time!
Teri - I like that name! Thanks. Well, it isn't "that" frustrating, is it? ;)
JR - They don't have to be controversial, just thought provoking. Something that is deep can be just as intriguing - even the funny stories might be more fun share over wine or lunch or coffee etc.
M@ - Well, let's see. This is not my area of specialization, but were they to tell a story as the population, at large, could not read?
Reawakening of an Athlete - Feel free to stop by anytime. There is always room at the table.
Dave - That is another aspect entirely. I find myself writing about something only to find others picking a different point in the post entirely. I do the same though - something catches my attention that might be completely off topic.
LB - Book clubs are great. I think that parents often find themselves focused so much on the day to day lives of their kids, telling kid stories, talking kid troubles etc with other parents, that we forget that we had brains that didn't involve kids at one point!
Exactly... perhaps blogs are the new way to meet people you want to get to know... I guess after a while of blogging with each other you can move on to coffee or meals, or in the case of long-distance, emails?
Sure, EO.
Somewhere there is the right combination of blog and bulletin board.
At one point, when K&B was popular, I was considering doing just that - having a BB where the good topics from the blog could remain alive for more than a day.
Alas, now I'm not writing about sex, no-one's interested.
I think that this is where the comments section comes in handy. When a blogger responds to comments made then you know that they are open to the philosophical discussion that you crave.
Ahh... I relate to this so much! Lots of times I feel like I have so much to say on a topic, but like you said, the author writes a new post and you have to... move on. I'm glad to know I'm not alone with feeling frustrated about this.
Carrie - I do think it works that way, which is kind of fun in its own way.
Wombat - I suppose that the comment section is not truly an opportunity for dialog where A BB might be.
Airam - It is all a different dynamic than other interactions. There are times when you can see a dialog and others... well, the dialog just isn't there. I wonder how often it goes on behind the scenes?
Brandy - You are definitely not alone. Sometimes I wish that the panel of commenter's was open for questions as I want the conversation to continue until it reaches a natural conclusion.
It's hard to do the sit-down/coffee/dinner thing from across the miles with a cyber-friend. But I understand the frustration when a good topic comes along and you just want to roll with it.
If you can't do it online because the original poster won't continue the dialog, and you yourself don't want to refer to it and get the dialog going on your own blog, then you might want to bring it up among your own friends.
Everyone needs friends you talk like that with (as well as tell you if those pants really do make your butt look big...)
So keep the conversation going! Its not like you don't have your own blog. :P
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