19 October, 2007

So There's This Guy....

Guy... hum... Let me start again. 
 
So there is this man... yes, that's better... at work....
 
You ever meet someone of the opposite sex that, without knowledge or effort, creates a response in you that is completely uncontrollable?
 
That response can be outrageous flirtation, but it can be something as simple as leaving you feeling attractive.  There is just something about the chemistry, the interaction, or the person themselves that changes the environment.  It probably isn't even detectable, but you might feel differently or act differently, unconsciously, when they are around. 
 
I know that this holds true for strangers or bad feelings.  The air just isn't right - we sense it without being able to put a finger on exactly what is "off."
 
I think that it happens in good ways as well.  Take this man, at work....
 
First, the guy is attractive - He is tall, has a nice southern accent, has great eyes, and most importantly, is confident and comfortable in his skin. 
 
In addition, the man is smart.  We are not just talking normal smart, but truly intelligent with an eye for detail and a memory like a steel trap.  He also has a fabulous sense of humor.
 
So really, there is nothing not to like about this guy.  Okay, you are right, he is human so... he has his faults, but he is still a great person. 
 
Today, I asked him a question.  Apparently he was on his way out of his office as he ended up walking down the hall with me back to my office...
 
And the air changed. 
 
Walking next to him, I realized that I felt a bit more feminine, a bit more confident, and a that I might have been standing just a tad straighter. 
 
And no, I don't have a crush on him. 
 
I simply noticed that I felt differently around him than I feel with other men - different inside myself. 
 
I suppose it is completely natural.  Our personalities respond to the personalities of those within our circle.  Some bring out our playfulness while others are more introspective and thoughtful.  Some free us to explore our imaginations... still others are co-conspirators and partners in crime.  And some leave us feeling more sexy and desirable than we felt minutes before..
 
And this man... well, he just happens to be one of those men who has such an effect on me!

12 comments:

TAG said...

Most interesting.

But, given that I am a man. A man that has no interest in other men in any sort of sexual context. Let me skip past the obvious questions I'm sure the ladies will ask. Instead let me ask the less obvious questions.

If one has a goal in life to be such a man, exactly what would one have to do to achieve that goal? I have always wanted to be the sort of person who upon leaving a room, business or group wants to leave things better than when I arrived. I want people to be happier about themselves and their situation, what ever it is. I love to leave people with a smile and maybe a laugh.

Another just as important question is do others see you as the same sort of person as this man? The sort of person that inspires others to feel more confident about themselves when you leave? While we've never met or spoken, I get the idea that perhaps you are.

Lastly, I wonder exactly how one knows if they are that sort of person. Can any of us know for sure if we inspire others to great things? Sometimes people will tell us. That is a wonderful feeling. But I suspect just as often we'll never know.

TAG

Aaron said...

Liar!

You're totally crushing on this guy. He makes you feel more feminine when you walk with him? I mean, comon'.

JustRun said...

Nothin' wrong with that.

cathouse teri said...

You don't have a crush on him. Ha ha. Right.

Yes, a man can make a woman feel very attractively feminine and a woman (probably a woman like you) can make a man feel attractively male.

It's what we like about usness.

Bre said...

I know exactly what you mean! One of my coworkers is that sort of guy. I think it's because he's so elementally male and we're on the same page when it comes to work issues but being with him is a boost. And you're right - its not a crush (he's clearly not my type AND he's married) it's just ... an ego boost? Well, you describe it much better anyways!

JsTzznU said...

Funny, being a guy. I've had this feeling myself.. (more attractive, etc...) When near/with a woman who herself is excreting these very same vibes!! It's addicting =)

No crush, my ASS LOL You love it and you know it!!

Scorpy said...

There is a woman at work that I have the same feelings toward but I only think of her when I see her or converse with her. Whenever, I am away from her (most of the day) I don't think about her but when she is around I find myself acting differently and always seem to seek her out when I'm in her building. It is in part because she makes me feel good as she flirts with me and smiles. I know it is just an office thing as she is married to a hulking giant and I'm no longer into married women but it still feels good all the same ;)

Anonymous said...

OK, so why did women swoon all over President Clinton, or someone like Alan Greenspan (that one I don't quite get)? Charm, humor, brains, confidence, power (with maybe some pheremones thrown in and, if he's lucky, he's half-attractive). That's an intoxicating mixture, and even men can feel that from another man (hetero men, that is).

It is, in a way, a crush, but you don't even have a consciousness of it (necessarily) because it's biological ... we're wired to react to that! ... and it's beautifl!

Bad, tho, to get involved with someone at work. Good to use the tenssion from the flirting between you to boost your femininity and send out your vibe to the world. (and you'll probably start dressing more carefully every day!)

TAG, if you're looking to be like that, start with confidence. It's the most powerful aphrodisiac. And a sense of humor, too.

cathouse teri said...

I agree. Confidence is the SUPER aphrodisiac.

TAG said...

I've never lacked confidence. Well, not in the past 15 years or so anyway. But I do recognize there is a fine line between being confident and being a jerk.

I think I do pretty well with being the sort of person who puts a smile on faces where I go. If anyone has any tips on being even better at it, I'd love to hear them.

TAG

Kennethwongsf said...

If everyone, male or female, feels the same way around this enigmatic man, then the phenomenon might be attributed to his charming personality. If the reaction is confined only to you, then it might be chemistry between you two.

But I think you are having a crush on him ;-)

The Exception said...

TAG - I will consider these questions and get back to you though I am not sure I have the answers.

Aaron - It probably could have been a crush at one point, but it isn't and it never truly was. Which, in a way, is different in its own right.

JR - Nothing wrong with it... exactly. It is kind of nice to have such people around.

Teri - You flatter me. I am not sure that I am such a person at all. Brain not body is my theme and... well, I don't exactly act like a "girl!" ;) (Sure, I look like one!)

Bre - Glad to hear someone believes it isn't a crush. This guy is married too and very great with his wife. It is simply the chemistry I guess... or something. It doesn't happen with all the men I work with - though it would be nice if it did!

Jstzznu - Truly not a crush in the normal definition of the word...

And it is nice to be around such people!

Scorpy - Exactly! I don't think about him often, and only in a work context. I go weeks without seeing him. We do flirt, but it is the flirtation that is easy because it is natural and just for fun. He is married too.

And probably a wise move to stay away from that one....You know what they say about playing with fire! ;)

Kat - Confidence is key, but I have to wonder if there is more to it as I work with lots of confident men. Perhaps it is a crush, as you define...

Kenneth - He is charming... but I am not sure that everyone has the same reaction. It is always interesting to note how different people are drawn to different characteristics in others; the seen and unseen.