I think I know how Atlas must feel.
Alone, on his own, weathering the elements and other challenges while he balances the world on his shoulders. He is aware that there is no end to his plight; no one is going to give him a well deserved break. Most of the time he doesn't think about it, but sometimes... I think Atlas wants a break. I think that Atlas would welcome the opportunity to rest his shoulders and his back, to flex his muscles, maybe he would even like to relax in a hot bath and let someone else hold the world up for a while.
This is one of those weeks when I feel like I am Atlas, holding the world. Or maybe even one of those people who balances plates on sticks - the plates must keep spinning on top of those sticks or they will all come crashing down, shattering into pieces.
What would happen if Atlas shrugged? Would the world come crashing down with the shifting of his muscles? What would happen if the sticks stopped spinning and the plates shattered? What would happen if, for one day, I was irresponsible?
Since I was little, I was the "responsible" one. I always knew better, behaved well, and could be relied upon to get the job done. Perhaps it is because I was the oldest child in the family, but it is probably a result of my personality as well. I just "do it!"
Things haven't really changed. I am still the responsible one. I do what needs to be done with little complaint and usually without much thought. But there are sometimes, like this week, when I feel like I want someone else to be the responsible one for a change. I find myself in envy of people who have nannies or wishing that I shared parenting responsibilities with someone. I watch as other parents have time to travel, read, share coffee with friends, or jointly discuss the issues surrounding their children - each playing an active role in the life of the child (whether they are married or divorced). Why can't this be me?
It has just been one of those weeks - emotionally draining and physically exhausting.
This Atlas wants to shrug!