30 May, 2008

Want to Hook up? Write a Blog.

Do men and women use their blogs to attract the opposite sex?  Are they used to get the opposite sex into bed?
 
I recently read a comment that alluded to the idea that the author of the post appeared to be using his blog to get women into bed. 
 
Granted, I am not immune to the power of the written word nor am I immune to the charms of some of the men who write.  I have had my fair share of blog crushes, done my share of flirting, and am familiar with some attractive and intriguing men via their sites.  But I have never thought that any of them are writing specifically to attract women or get them into bed. 
 
But then again, I am not sure how such an invitation would appear?  How would a man (or woman) write a post that would illustrate such a desire?  (If my intent was to invite men into my bed, regrettably, I have failed... miserably!)
 
Each post gives insight into a person's way of thinking.  Some are funny, engaging, charming, and even touching.  It is easy to develop a crush on some writers as a result of their style, use of words, and the glimpse of the person that lies beneath the words. 
 
In that light, I am not surprised that there are people who have met and married as a result of their blogs.  That is pretty amazing, but I doubt it was the intent when each started writing.
 
I know women, and men, who have been stalked and harassed as a result of their blogs and zealous readers.  (Thankfully, I am not one of these people!)
 
There are men that I would enjoy actually chatting with or even meeting as a result of what I have read via their blogs.  But there are women about whom I could say the same thing. 
 
The comment struck a chord, are blogs a new form of personal ad?  Do people use their blogs to attract potential love interests?  Is this a new way to hook up?
 
I wonder what image I am giving those men who read The Exception?  Am I suggesting that I am a cold sexless mom uninterested in men?  Or perhaps a sexy, hot blooded American woman who happens to be a mom and misses being a woman as well?  Regardless of the perception, I doubt that they are thinking that I am using this site or my posts as a tool of seduction!  (Perhaps I should post pictures?!)

18 comments:

Dave said...

Seduction by the written word, flung hundreds and thousands of miles around the country and the world? A bit inefficient and so far, totally ineffective based on my experience. I even added a picture showing all my best features a couple of months ago. Nada.

If you figure it out, let me know.

Carrie said...

It's like that Twix commercial that's running now: the guy invites a girl back to his apartment under the guise of blogging. WTF?

cathouse teri said...

Blogging is just another tool for communication. It can be used for anything that any form of communication is used for.

Mike said...

Pictures are good.

JustRun said...

I am quite certain that not one of my posts would get anyone into bed. Except maybe the dog to warm my feet when I complain about winter.

Anonymous said...

As Scotty used to say. "Please post pics!"

Crazy Computer Dad said...

I think blog crushes can be pretty common. Our desires and fantasies can take things that are written and drive us pretty quickly to an illusion that we really want to believe is the reality. Reality is almost never as good as the fantasy.

People get into chat rooms, online dating, etc and decide they want to be with some one based solely on what they have written all the time.

I've never met anyone in person from the blogosphere. I started blogging as a way of venting personal issues (not a good idea for a dating blog) and to look for help from other people with children like my son (also not good for a seductive blog). :-)

cathouse teri said...

I dunno, Computer Dad, you never know what is sexy. And from the looks of it, you ARE!

Dave said...

Exception, you seem to have created a cyber seduction in your comments.

Anonymous said...

Interesting post. I would have never thought, honestly, to try to attract a man through blogging.

Or go after a male blogger (although I don't know a lot or read a lot of them.)

I do the whole blogging thing more for a sense of community--finding people like myself, being able to identify with their struggles, wants, desires and reconcile those with my own.

To each their own, I guess!

cathouse teri said...

Here's a funny story. My friend and I were out for a drink last night. She's my roommate actually. And she wanted to go to Wal-Mart. I begged off and went home. I hate Wal-Mart.

She likes to spend an hour or longer there just meandering up and down the aisles, getting ideas for decorating and such.

She texted me and said that FOUR men hit on her. I said, "Well now I know where to tell women to go to meet men!"

Aaron said...

After reading this, I'm obviously not reading the same blogs. Or posting a picture of my girlfriend on my own blog appends to serve as a good enough deterrent. :)

The Exception said...

Dave - There is most definitely a seductive power to the written word. I have just never considered that people might actually be using it in blog form to seduce or that others might perceive something written to be a seduction.

Carrie - Have not seen the commercial but... seriously... that is just odd!!

CT - So true, we write for various reasons and with different intents... and the perceptions of others varry as well.

Mike - Pictures are good; I like seeing them and taking them!

JR - I am right there with you - no men knocking down my door of flooding my inbox!

Emma - Ah, yes, but pictures would ruin my mistique! ;)

CCD - I hope that you have been able to find the forum you saught.

The crushes are easy - as Teri suggests sexy takes different forms and is something that is as individual as the people reading, viewing, or involved.

Singleworkingmommy - We each write for so very different reasons. I read the blogs of several men because I love the different perspectives and read those of a diverse group of women for the same reasons. It is great that we all have the ability and the freedom to write and read at will

Aaron - Ah, you just never know what the women who read you are thinking. ;) (But yes, your openness about having a girlfriend does not work in favor of getting another woman into your bed!)!

CT - I am headed to Walmart!! ;)

Kennethwongsf said...

If I suspect a blogger's ulterior motive is to find a mate, I'll question the blog's content--for the same reason I always question press releases and advertisements. It's bound to be self-promoting.

TAG said...

I suppose my blog name alone would lead some conclude that is my exact intention.

That conclusion couldn't be more wrong.

To date, I have not met anyone as a result of my blog. In fact I've only talked to two readers. They each have very serious real life relationships.

If my intent were to "hook up" it would seem I have failed terribly. Guess it's a good thing that was not (is not) my intent.

TAG

The Exception said...

Kenneth - Good point! Someone writing with such a motive may be exagerating or engaging a great deal of self promotion...

TAG - It is always interesting to see what others perceive in comparison to the reality!

I have only ever talked to one other person with a blog. Which is interesting in itself.

Seven Seas said...

Hmm, I must be doing something wrong then. My blog has never attracted the fairer sex into my bedroom, in fact it actually made one woman never speak to me again ("You support the war in Iraq, you're a Nazi don't speak to me again!" -direct quote). Never thought to use it as a personal ad for myself. Truth be known, I write it for me. I like that people read it, but even if no one read it I would still write it.

Scotty said...

Wouldn't it be a bit hard? I mean, to find someone in the same area as you?

I dunno, never have thought about this one. But, can definitely see your point.