25 July, 2008

How to Find a Table or The Missionary Table

This morning, while on the phone with a Canadian coworker who just bought a new house and is seeking furniture.

"I wanted a small, round, glass table because there isn't a lot of room. Wood is so formal and can be heavy, and I didn't want anything with carvings. But the glass tables seemed to lack stability and endurance. "

She has my undivided attention at this point because, I know that there is something good coming. I know that there is a reason behind all the build up to this story. The woman has brought me to tears and then gales of laughter within a single conversation. Not only can she tell a great story, but her life is so much different than my own. Plus, I am not really supposed to be at work today anyway.

"Then I saw it. It is a clean lined, wooden, Mission style table."

Interesting choice as my Canadian friend is quite contemporary in her taste for the most part.

"The legs were solid, a good 8 inches in circumference at the top with a tapered curve at the bottom"

And then... the moment I had been waiting for...

""It was the kind of table that you could have the wildest sex of your life on and never worry about it breaking!"

(Because this is honestly how she measures the quality and stability of a table *sigh* If only it were mine as well!)

7 comments:

said...

Ha!! She sounds like a blast! Does she have a blog too?! ;)

Anonymous said...

I guess that's one way to measure a table's worth.
Pretty funny.
But .. it's mission-style table; how wild can the sex possibly be???
;-)

Anonymous said...

Hilarious friend... she sounds so much fun to be around!

The Exception said...

T - She is awesome and if she has a blog, I don't know about it!

Kat - Apparently the theory is based on personal experience - she broke a table while engaged one time so... I suppose it can get pretty wild!

ALU - She is crazy and funny and one of the most wonderful people. She is like having an older sister who has done everything and then some!

Anonymous said...

Excellent standards! Works for me!

Anonymous said...

Dinner time would never be the same for me... I'd never think to have sex on the kitchen table,
but i did observe that the height of one my bathroom sinks is just right. LOL

The Exception said...

Ruby - I will never look at another table the same way!

Just a Man - sinks, tables, washing machines, chairs....the possibilities are endless!