05 March, 2009

When Seeing is Believing

I am the most oblivious person when it comes to knowing when and if men are checking me out.  We are not talking I don’t care or it embarrasses me.  We are talking, I do not know, notice, or even think to look.  It is pure oblivion on my part.

Friends are the people that tell you these things.  They are the folks that go out of their way to point out the things that you are missing or to bring your attention to the details that you seem to miss.  Matt is one such friend.  When we go to lunch, he likes to note the different men who check me out – the point being to make me more aware of this happening.

He continually attempts to convince me that I am missing a lot of looks.  That there are men totally checking me out.  They don’t approach, which is another question in itself, but they definitely look.

And so we were at lunch.  We sat at Legal Seafood during the lunch hour one week day discussing life in general and our kids and our love interests etc. 

“There’s one”

“And another”

“And the guy through the window”

“The young guy over there has looked various times”

As Matt pointed out this and that guy, I sat enjoying the commentary and my meal.  Completely oblivious to all these men and their looks.  (Which, for me, is quite easy to do apparently?) 

Another young guy glanced my way every few minutes until his food arrived… The fish he ordered then had his attention wrapped.  The man must have been starving!  (Attractive woman vs. fish lunch...)

After a fun and entertaining lunch, we made our way out of the restaurant.  Apparently a few more looks came my way… as usual, I didn’t notice.

As we left, the table of three twenty-something guys who had ogled just happened to be finished with their meal and have paid their tab.  They left behind us.  We walked to grab coffee.  They walked to grab coffee. 

“Don’t tell me.  They are bees drawn to honey…”  (The dress I wore definitely hinted at cleavage)

There is a part of me that will never understand men, but then again, I don’t really understand myself.  Sometimes I think I live in this little bubble.  I wonder if I have conditioned myself to believe that I am invisible unless I want to be seen.    I wonder if I truly believe that no one notices me.  I wonder how much attention I am missing by not noticing; or whether my life is that much more because I am not noticing. 

The lunch was fun.  The commentary as to how the men were behaving was hilarious.  And yet, I have a hard time believing that it all happened.  Sometimes seeing really is believing… and this is one of those times when I don’t see things well. 




MindyMom said...

I tend to be obvlivious too, especially when I'm out with another person. All my attention is focused on who I'm with so even if someone I knew were in the resturant with us I probably wouldn't notice. That has actually happened to me before, or in the grocery store when I'm on a mission and people think I blew them off because I didn't notice. I would make a terrible witness.

Sounds like Matt is a great friend to have and good for the ego! I wonder why all those guys were checking you our when you were with another guy though? Men!

dadshouse said...

I think a lot of women don't want men to notice them unless the woman wants to be noticed. I had some Dad's House readers tell me that during my How to Grill Asparagus post. They said it was creepy that I was checking women out across a restaurant. (Haha)

Maybe these potential suitors didn't approach you because you were with this man at lunch? Or maybe because it's hard to approach in public - especially a restaurant.

Next time you end up at coffee, separate yourself form Matt for a long enough while that men can approach you. Either send him to the bathroom, or you go get sugar and cream and take your damn sweet time about it. See what happens! Report bsck :-)

Mama Llama said...

Funny...when at coffee or at lunch with you, I don't notice what others are doing, nor do I care much, as I'm too engrossed in conversation with you.

You are my priority; I would feel put off by someone who is too busy noticing what others are doing or noticing rather than focusing on mutual company.

But that's just me...

Be well, TE.

Lad Litter said...

Thst sounds like an enormous amount of attention to be getting during one lunch at a restaurant. And you didn't notice? I hope it wasn't gay guys checking out your companion. And him not noticing ;-)