19 October, 2009

Finding Words isn't Always Easy

One of the most difficult aspects of having a blog, that people sometimes read, is that it is often difficult to find the right words to write.  There is much to say and yet, to say them in the best way is not always easy.  

Earlier this week I sat in the chair at the dentist allowing Italian songs to pour over me.  While my mouth endured operations I would prefer not to remember, my eyes closed, and I allowed the amazing sounds to fill my head.  I didn’t sit and translate.  I just let myself listen and understand.  Despite the events taking place in my mouth, my mind and heart were at peace. 

That peace is something I needed to feel. 

A sense of peace is something I used to find in writing.

Right now though, my heart is very sad.  My heart is overwhelmed with the reality that people are manipulative and often self centered and some aren’t beyond using their own children as tools to get their way. 

I remind myself that love is love… it is truth and light and it is like truth – it will overcome and remain when all else is gone

Before all else is gone though – there is the other stuff.  There is the anger and frustration and control.  There is the use of kids  and money and manipulation to get one’s way.  There are challenges to over come and great amounts of fear to face.  There are hard times ahead and choices that constantly require infusions of love – choices to be made from a position of balance and not fear.

And yet there is hope – there is love… and at the end of the day if my writing seems to be more about both of these two of late, it is because it is on hope and love that I choose to invest my time over the control and fear that I feel just beyond the walls of my little home. 

Italy calls to me as do the Italian words of the music that is the sound track of my days…

“Vivere”  Live!!  Or Dare to Live!!

This is something I am doing.  Not only am I daring to live, I am daring to love, daring to hold true to myself… and I am daring to share. 

(Now if I could just find the words to express all I am feeling!)

 

3 comments:

dadshouse said...

Si, vivere! Vivere! Dare to live!

It's better to invest time in hope and love than worry.

Mark said...

You have found the words and they are eloquent in expressing how you feel. Dare to love, dare to live, for one cannot be done without the other.

justrun said...

I hear ya! And yet, we keep trying. Which I think is one version of hope.


:)