26 October, 2007

Purely Mechanics - Nothing More, Nothing Less

Sex is an activity that comes in many forms, styles, moods, environments and situations.  I think that I have experienced the good and the bad, the fabulous and the awkward, the hurried and the relaxed, and even the passionate and the distant.  I have even experienced something that I can only categorize as... mechanical.  
When I say mechanical, I mean that there was nothing intimate about the situation, which is odd in itself given that sex is, by nature, an act with a degree of intimacy.  This particular experience lacked intimacy outside the physical.  It was purely mechanical.  There is no other way to describe it.
Strictly an NSA, I did not have high expectations.  The guy thought he was quite the stud.  I finally decided that he needed to put up or shut up as I was a bit tired of hearing how great he was...and, it was...he was... well, it seems that there was some embellishment and exaggeration in his boasting. 
Call me a romantic but I like intimate moments to be intimate.  This doesn't mean that they can't be driven by chemistry and passion or do not involve laughter and creativity.  It means that they involve two people rather than being simply about inserting tab A into slot B!
But that is exactly what this experience was - inserting tab A into slot B.  There was nothing intimate about it.  In fact, it was very mechanical. 
My mind laughed at the experience as it was happening.  Bewildered, my brain never disengaged.  My body, on the other hand, reacted.  It not only reacted, but it shocked me completely in its response.  I felt betrayed by its behavior.  
The experience lasted mere minutes and then, it was over.  My reaction was, "That was weird".  I have never considered doing it again.  Yes, from the waist down, it was probably fabulous, but from the waist up... it was uneventful and nonexistent.  
It was a wash.  He was not a stud, and I was happy to have that mystery solved.  
I never expected to hear from him again and did not intend to contact him.  
But I have heard from him.  I continue to hear from him via IM.  He wants to do it again.  He has wanted to do it again for 2 years.  He is relentless in his pursuit; 2 plus years of an IM or two a week.  (Not a stalker and nothing threatening)  
Did I miss something?
He says that he finds me desirable.  
I think that he liked what he was able to do to my body and wants to make it happen again.  That is the only reason I can give for why he would want to do it again. 
It can't have been a great experience for him?  Seriously, it was not exactly memorable, remarkable, or worth mentioning here except...
He wants to do it again... Why??? 


AaroN said...

I'm sure he says that to all the ladies.

JustRun said...

I think we tend to under estimate what is considered "great" by some men.

Scotty said...

Because he thinks that he lived up to his boasting.


Just tell him that you've had (or will have) better since then, and he'll be quiet ;)

Mike said...

Probably because all the other women wanted a relationship. Just be honest and tell him no since I didn't see that in your blog. No offense women usually hope us guys will "get it". I have to admit I am higher on the food chain then most guys and I still don't get it always. Be honest like you would want someone to be with you.

Scorpy said...

A: He is a man,
B: He is a man, and
C: It is sex! LOL
Seriously, I don't know him so I can't answer for him but sex rather than love may have something to do with it. As you stated there are different kinds of the 'Act' and he may consider the form you had as the norm and appreciate it. He may never been 'taught' or 'experienced' the pleasures of using all of the model instead of just the cut out tabs ;) So do you want to teach him or just let it slide? It is up to you but if the chemistry wasn't there the first time it probably won't be the next time either. You also have to ask yourself why did you sleep with him in the first place? Was it all about you or the both of you? I have a girl I call 'stalker girl' and although she no longer stalks so much she still occasionally texts or rings or finds me out and about. I know the sex between us is meaningless and she does nothing for me other than offer release but SHE thinks its great. I am now officially talking rubbish and will stop :)

Wombat said...

He's broken the seal. You're an open bottle of fine liquor now.

The re-awakening of an Athlete said...

Two years and an IM or two once a week? Wow. Tenacious!

I have had my moments where I would love to have sex with a woman and have asked for more after the encounter, but probably never pursued for more than a week or two. A. I either get the hint or B. just move on. Period.

Yet, you probably right about what he did to you or perhaps your body was radiating "excellent" feelings as opposed to your upper half being totally opposite.

I would not give him another shot though. You could double your IM messages =)

ruby said...

An IM/contact about wanting round two weekly for two years? Wow...he must have thought you were amazing! Or he wants a FWB.

M@ said...

Mere minutes? Whenever i have the opportunity to have sex, she has to... kick me out.

Indiana said...

There are some women, that life lets you taste, but not truly savour, and in those cases you very often want to enjoy her again.

And as you said, "your body betrayed you"...for him you had an amazing time, he did not and still does not know you were laughing at him on the inside.

The Exception said...

Aaron - You are probably right... NOT! ;)

JR - Very true. Sometimes I am sure that they like it simple and cold - just the mechanics.

Scotty - You think that he thinks he lived up to his billing? Hum... possible. I hadn't considered that.

Mike - I have told him "no" to which he responds "You are full of it."

Scorpy - I feel badly for him if that is the case. I understand the need for release - but so often and purely mechanical? It wasn't even purely physical as that requires a lot more activity then was experienced!

Wombat - the liquor is going bad!

Re-awakening - My body was probably giving him the wrong impression - true. I do wish he would move on though! (And I definitely do not want to increase my IMs)

Ruby - I did absolutely nothing - and you are right in that he probably wants an FB - or a body or something... it isn't a "whole" experience he is after (even one without strings)

M@ - Why do I think it is actually the other way round?!

Indiana - Oh, to be one of those women! ;) The first part of your comment is so true - and applies to men as well.

I am not laughing at him and never did. I am not sure what I feel toward him beyond confusion as to his behavior.